Professional Intelligence

How to give and receive feedback (5+5 tips)

By February 27, 2023No Comments

No matter how good professionals we are, at some point problems will appear and we will be forced to have a difficult conversation.

Whether it’s the persona who is offering the feedback, or who is receiving it, these conversations are not tasteful for anyone.

And it is that many professionals get blocked, nervous or do not know how to find the exact words to communicate assertively.

However, one of the fundamental skills A good professional is to be able to offer and accept advice, opinions and even criticism.

That’s why today we are going to give you a series of practical tips to give and receive feedback like an expert. Read on to find out more:

Giving and receiving feedback: Change your vision

First of all, it is to change the chip. Feedback is not a positive or negative evaluation, but an opportunity to improve, to strengthen confidence and achieve honest communication with other people.

If given and received with the right attitude, feedback can become an experience as positive as it is binding for both people. In addition, it is one of the most important levers to raise performance., own and others.

It is about knowing how to do it and understanding that the focus should be on the WHY instead of the WHY.

To achieve this, it is essential that you take into account a series of recommendations.

5 Tips for Giving Feedback

1. Find the right time

Choose the time when the other person can be most receptive, without delaying too much. 

It may be a good idea to let a few hours pass to get perspective. But the event on which you are going to provide feedback must be recent. for it to be effective.

2. Take care of the message

Choose carefully the words you are going to use. To give good feedback, the message must be specific, applicable, useful, and fact-based. 

For example: “We have received a complaint from a regular customer about your way of handling complaints”It’s a good start to feedback. 

However, “I think you’re not treating customers the way they deserve.”It places the conversation on an emotional plane that will not achieve good results.

3. Beware of forbidden words

There are words that should be avoided in good feedback such as “Always”, “Never”, “Everything” or “Completely”. In general, all words perceived as absolute terms generate great discomfort in the receiver. 

Another word you should avoid is “But”. It is said to be the great universal draft, since what goes before that word is automatically canceled out of the listener’s attention.

4. Don't give negative feedback about identity

This happens when you tell the person what you think they are, without stopping to think that this is simply your own perception.

Avoid the verb “To be.” Phrases how to “You are a clueless person” o “I think you’re still immature for a position of responsibility.” they will make the interlocutor feel attacked and you will not achieve your goal of improvement.

5. Take responsibility for what you say to gain credibility

Never put comments in the mouths of others or replicate what others said:“I have been told that you have been late for the last meetings”, is a feedback that will only expose your team to internal conflicts.

Instead, speak in the first person singular. “I have seen that you have been late to the last three meetings”.

Your comments should always be the result of behaviors you have observed firsthand and never of what you have been told.


You already know the tips to give good feedback, but … what if you are the one who receives it? Without a doubt, you have a learning opportunity in front of you that you can make the most of with these tips.

5 tips for receiving feedback

1. Communicate if the time is right

Before we said that the person who is going to give feedback must look for the right moment, but no matter how well he does it, he cannot be in the skin of the person who is going to receive it.

That is why it is very important that, as a receiver, you transmit if that is a good time for you or maybe you will be more receptive at another time.  Thus, you will both avoid possible awkward moments and have a really useful conversation.

2. Listen and ask questions

Listen carefully and ask everything you consider necessary to have a clear vision of the facts.

  • Is there anything you don’t understand?
  • Do you understand the problem but not the solution?
  • Are you not clear about what concrete actions are proposed?
  • Are you missing any data?

Don’t be afraid to ask. Feedback is a conversation between professionals, not a hierarchical monologue. If you do not ask, you can lose very relevant information for your professional development.

3. Show trust

The intention of the other person is not to generate discomfort, but to help you improve. Trust it by having a calm attitude.

If you receive feedback it is in person, a tip Basic is to maintain eye contact. In addition, reinforce the message they give you with simple and effective gestures, such as nodding, showing respect for the words you hear.

4. Don't download emotions on the other

Keep in mind that feedback is an act of generosity. A gift for you to grow, and so it must be recognized.

Therefore, if you are receiving feedback and do not like what you are listening to, do not get carried away by the emotion of the moment. Just listen to what they’re saying, reflect at home, and postpone your response until a time when your emotion doesn’t contaminate the conversation.

5. Inquire about your mindset

In addition to following these tips, it will be very useful to reflect on your general attitude to feedback. Think: 

When you are offered improvements… Do you have a learning mindset? 

Or, conversely, do you paralyze yourself with a protective mindset?

If you close yourself to the situation, it will be very difficult for you to ask yourself new questions, ask yourself other realities or accept that any task is susceptible to improvement. This way, you’ll only hold on to your opinion.

To lean towards learning, you should welcome the feedback you receive with openness to experience, making it possible for improvements to become a reality in the future.

Conclusion: How to give and receive feedback

These are just some basic tips on how to give and receive feedback, but there are many widely studied techniques to improve feedback between professionals.


And it is that feedback is still a pending issue in most organizations, when its advantages are obvious. According to the Qualtrics 2021 Report About employee experience: 

  • Companies that apply the learning achieved in feedback processes drive the commitment of their teams up to 80%
  • Organizations that create a feedback culture decrease employee turnover rate by 15%

That’s why at BeUp we have been developing for 15 years Programs on how to give and receive high-level feedback, from a very pragmatic point of view and based on the latest neuroscientific research.

Companies such as Banco Santander, Axa, Orange, Inditex, Aldi o Roche They have already learned the essential keys to creating powerful conversations that contribute to the growth of their professionals.

Do you want us to help your organization too? Write to us and we will tell you how.

BeUp S.L.

C/ Gustavo Fernández Balbuena, 11 – loft 2 A
28002 Madrid

T: (+34) 910001268